What is coaching? Or life
coaching?
The
definition for coaching that I like the most is by Stephen
Fairley, who said, “Coaching is a one-to-one interactive
relationship that helps people identify and accomplish their
personal and professional goals faster than they could on their
own” (Getting Started in Personal and Executive Coaching,
31).
Coaching is
a partnering relationship that maintains focus on the wants and
desires of the client. Coaching shares many of its skills with
other professional fields like counseling, psychology,
consulting and mentoring. While coaching may have similarities
to these other fields, it’s very important to understand
that coaching is in a class of its own (please see differences
from counseling, consulting and mentoring below). Within the
field of coaching, there are many different specialties, however
most coaches fall into one of these 3 categories: business
coach, executive coach, and life or relationship coach.
Business coaches typically work with small and medium-sized
businesses to create strategies for growth and development,
while executive coaches focus on coaching the individual
executives working within a business or company. Life or
relationship coaches help people in all aspects of their lives
and may focus on a wide range of personal and/or professional
fulfillment goals.
How does coaching work?
Coaching
usually occurs through a variety of processes, such as:
brainstorming and envisioning, information sharing, goal
achievement, assignment completion, structure, critical
thinking, honest communication, clear direction, accountability,
directive questioning, and unconditional support. In a typical
session, the client generally shares their current goals and
accompanying challenges, and how they would like to use coaching
to help them address these topics. The coach then partners with
the client to clarify their goals, brainstorm possible ideas,
develop creative strategies, overcome personal obstacles and
determine appropriate action steps for achievement or success.
Clients appreciate the support and structure provided in the
coaching relationship and 98.5% of all coaching clients
say they were satisfied with their coach and coaching
relationship!
Who does coaching help?
A coach
generally works with high functioning individuals who are
mentally and emotionally ready to move forward in life. They
are individuals who are ready to take things up a level and
challenge themselves to live more authentically either
personally, professionally, or both. Coaching clients are not
perfect people however, and they have personal weaknesses and
ways of sabotaging their own progress, just like the rest of
us. Having a coach allows these individuals to see their own
blind spots and work towards changing them, while at the same
time specifying their goals and effectively and systematically
pursuing them. It should be noted that coaching does not
help people who have a great deal of difficulty accepting
constructive criticism and honest feedback. Any client who has
reasonable expectations of personal or professional improvement
must be open to the process of coaching as well as to the
results that may or may not be achieved.
Where does coaching happen?
Coaching can
happen anywhere there’s a coach with someone to talk to! For
coaches who are truly “called” to the field, I believe coaching
is always happening. While it can happen in any
environment, most coaching is done over the phone for
convenience and reliability. Some clients prefer to meet their
coach in person and often times they will choose to meet in
public at a coffee shop, restaurant or other venue. Coaching
occurs also when clients are working individually on their goals
and completing their coaching assignments. Lastly, coaching
happens in groups where coaches work with businesses, companies
or organizations.
Why does coaching work?
Coaching
works because a little bit of honesty, support, enthusiasm and
focus can go a LONG way! I like this quote from C.J. Hayden
that states, “When you set a specific goal and begin checking
your progress against it on a regular basis, your day-to-day
activities start to shift in the direction that supports your
goal.” (Get Clients Now!, 41) A coach helps you say what
you want, gain the resources to pursue it and find the courage
to go out and get it --- all without feelings of judgment,
pressure or ridicule. Coaching works because clients are able
to achieve their goals more successfully and more quickly than
if they had approached them alone. A coach holds the client to
what he or she says they want in life to ensure that they stay
the course and keep the goals in mind.
What makes coaching
different from counseling?
While
coaching and counseling are very different from each other, they
are often compared to each other, or mistaken for the same
service. In counseling, a therapist or other mental health
professional is perceived as an expert who is working to
diagnose or treat a particular problem or issue. In coaching,
the “client” is perceived as a complete and whole individual
with their own brilliant solutions. Coaching clients are not
broken individuals that need fixing, but are forward moving
people who are looking to accelerate their progress. The focus
of coaching is to move a client forward in considering the
future possibility of creating a life they deserve and living a
life that is authentic to their true self! Coaching asks “what
do you really want?” and “what are you willing to do to get
it?” Coaching helps people answer the question, “what am I
capable of?”
What makes coaching
different from consulting?
Similar to
counseling, consulting usually involves an individual (or
individuals) who offer(s) advice or direction on a project or
for a business. Consultants usually provide advice and
suggestions on how, where and when to proceed with a particular
issue or project. Coaching is different from consulting because
it regards the client as the expert, and the coach is involved
as a catalyst of growth to deepen learning, rather than as a
leader or director. A Coach will assist a client to discover
their own solutions by offering reflective listening, powerful
questioning and other coaching skills as a way to partner with
the client. The client, however, is the leader in charge
of each session. The client is responsible for planning the
session agenda, and deciding which area, topic, project or goal
requires the most attention in their life.
What makes coaching
different from mentoring?
Mentoring
typically involves an older, and usually well-seasoned or more
experienced individual who has traveled a similar path to the
one the client wishes to travel. A mentor can help individuals
to understand the next step, by following the mentor’s path or
direction in life or business. A mentor is usually perceived as
a figure of authority who offers direction and wisdom. A coach
is considered to be more of a partner who offers assistance and
support to the client in the direction that they choose for
themselves. For this reason, a coach does not always need age
or a great amount of life experience to offer insightful,
intuitive or helpful feedback and information to their clients.
A coach may simply have a gifted way of relating to or
communicating with individuals that is powerful, effective and
useful.
What are the benefits and
results of coaching?
While
results vary among clients, those clients who are
fully-committed to their future seem to benefit a great deal
from the coaching relationship. Some results experienced among
coaching clients might include: increased awareness and deepened
self-discovery; improvements to time and/or stress management;
cessation of unhealthy or bad habits and behaviors; improvements
to personal relationships; increased levels of self-confidence
or communication; clarity of life purpose; greater balance with
work and life; insight into and change of maladaptive life
strategies; weight loss and/or management; increased
productivity at work; improved ability to relax and enjoy
recreation; defined focus on personal passion and life
direction; more organized life; change to a job they feel
passionate about; increased understanding of self, personality
and needs; improved self-care; achieved professional goals;
overcoming personal fears or obstacles; improvements in public
speaking abilities; etc. In general, the major benefit of
coaching is having someone else believe in you and challenging
you to pursue more for yourself in life, work and relationships.
What does a coaching session
look like?
If you
have not experienced a ‘trial session’,
then the main goal of your first coaching session will be to
explore where you are, and the possibilities of “what might be”
in your life, if you were to really pursue all that you want for
yourself and your life. We would also consider the path to
helping you achieve your personal goals and we would decide if
coaching might help you achieve those goals faster. If coaching
would benefit you, then we would schedule a weekly
session time and begin the coaching process immediately. Also
on the agenda for the first session is to answer any questions
you might have about the coach or the coaching process.
If you
have already experienced your ‘trial session’,
then our first session will be guided by the items on your
agenda for the coaching session, and any materials you were
given as part of the coaching process. As a client, you may be
given materials by the coach to assist you in preparation for
each session, but you should already have a good idea of how you
want to use your coach, and come prepared with your own agenda.
Why would someone hire a
coach?
People hire
coaches for many different reasons. Generally, what they have
in common is a great interest to move forward in their life.
Clients are looking for a change and they usually desire to work
towards a specific goal of personal or professional achievement
or fulfillment. While one person may have interest in managing
their weight, organizing their home, and changing unwanted
habits or behaviors, another person may want help finding their
life’s passion, exploring new vocational options, improving
their interpersonal skills or increasing their level of
self-awareness. Common goals with clients usually consist of
mid- to long-term goals focused on creating more success,
encountering more happiness, improving work-life balance,
exploring personal passion, enriching relationships and
improving self through discovery and re-definition.
What do you talk about with
a coach?
People talk
about a wide variety of things with their coach. Some choose to
share about their stress, family troubles, job dissatisfaction,
relationship issues, or other negative experiences that they are
wanting to change. Other individuals focus on talking about
goals that are directly connected to improving their life,
wealth, health, education, status, or overall well-being. Every
client is different and session topics vary greatly.
What is the role of the
coach?
The coach’s
role is to assist you in maintaining energy, focus, motivation
and attention to the goals and desires in your life. If you’re
struggling to keep up with your life, then your coach will help
you explore and then create the healthy life balance you desire.
If you desire to make a change in your life and would benefit
from outside support to help you stay on task to completion,
then a coach will help you do that. If you are ready to explore
your authentic self and create the life you deserve, but you’re
confused about where to start, a life coach would help you
explore and maximize your potential. If you simply want to
bounce your ideas off of someone, a coach would serve as a great
sounding board where your creative ideas would be encouraged and
supported. Finally, a life coach may, at times, play the role
of teacher, trainer, motivator, partner and/or friend. The
coach’s role is to help you gain clarity, focus and passion to
pursue what you want in life and hold you to those goals so you
can focus on what really matters.
How long does someone work
with a coach?
While each
client varies, most clients will average around three to six
months in the coaching relationship. Coaching can be provided
on a month-to-month basis, but most clients choose a three, six,
nine or even twelve month agreement. It all depends on what the
client wants and needs. Most clients are encouraged to start
with at least a three month agreement in order to ensure that
they get to experience the full benefit of being coached.
Who is an ‘ideal’ client?
I like to
describe an ideal client as “anyone who is aware that where they
are, is not where they want to be!” Clients want more and they
want to change. Ideal clients are ready to step up, be
themselves and get serious about pursuing what they want in
life! They are ready to grow and change into a better and more
authentic self. Another great quality of ideal clients is that
they have a good level of teach-ability – they are receptive to
personal growth and honest feedback. People who have a hard
time taking constructive criticism or who tend to become
defensive when spoken to truthfully and honestly, would
not make ideal clients because they show a
natural resistance to growth and personal improvement. However,
if these individuals recognized their traits as potential areas
of growth, then they could benefit a great deal from life
coaching.
How much does it cost?
Typical
coaching fees range anywhere from $50 an hour, for less
experienced coaches, to well over $500 an hour, for Executive
and Business Coaches. The average hourly cost for life coaches
falls around $107 an hour. Coaching fees and other services for
More Authentic Life, average between $75 and $200 per hour.
Clients who enter into a three or six month coaching agreement
also receive additional bonuses and discounted coaching fees as
part of the coaching package.
What if I can’t afford it?
If you
cannot afford coaching but feel that you could really benefit
from it, please don’t be afraid to call and discuss your
situation. In some instances, fees are reduced or waived for
individuals in special circumstances. Personally, I believe
coaching should be available to any person wanting to live their
best life. I don’t mind offering my services to clients who
could benefit from coaching, but who have unique situations or
are unable to afford my fees.
What about confidentiality?
Coaching is
a “professional-client relationship,” similar to the
relationship shared between patient and doctor, or client and
lawyer. You can trust that all information exchanged with your
coach will be held in strict confidence, except when required by
law or when your written consent has been provided.
How do I find a good coach?
To find a
good coach you should first decide what it is you’re looking for
in a coach and what it is you’re hoping to achieve with a
coach. If you want to improve your business, consider hiring a
“Business Coach”. If you want to improve your self-confidence,
look for a “Life Coach”. There are so many resources on the web
that a good search should come up with many possibilities.
Before you hire any coach or enter into a coaching agreement,
make sure that you experience a fairly strong connection with
your coach and that you have a coach who is strong enough to
tell you the truth, without intimidating or pressuring you.
Finally, don’t forget to ask your coach about their experience
in helping people just like you, and what types of results those
clients were able to achieve as a results of the coaching
relationship.
How can I get the maximum
benefit from our coaching relationship?
The first
and best way to get the maximum benefit is to call or arrive to
your coaching sessions on time. Show up for your sessions
prepared by creating an agenda that outlines what you want to
focus on, and follow through with you coaching assignments! On
a more personal note, the absolute best way to maximize the
coaching relationship is to be honest with yourself (and your
coach) about where you are, what you want in life and what you
intend to do about it.
What does a coach expect of
the client in the coaching relationship?
Mainly, a
coach expects the client to call or arrive to all session on
time and be ready to move forward in their life. A coach also
expects that the client will be prepared for each session,
having all assignments and commitments completed or achieved.
Finally, a coach expects that the client will be honest and will
keep their word on commitments. A coach does NOT expect their
client to be perfect, but believes that they want what they
want, even when they don’t act like it!
What if it doesn’t work?
I am
completely confident that you’ll see progress in your life goals
as a result of our coaching sessions, so that’s why I have no
problem offering a 100% money-back guarantee. Just call me
within 48 hours of your session and I’ll gladly provide you a
refund you for the session as well as for any unused sessions.
The only thing I ask for in return is to understand the one
thing I could have done differently to coach you successfully.
How do I get started?
The best way
to get started with life coaching is to contact me directly by
phone, or
online to schedule your trial coaching
session (It’s free and there’s absolutely no obligation to
continue). After your initial experience of coaching, you’ll
know if it’s something you should continue with or not.
How should I prepare for my
first (free) consult?
To prepare
for your first
FREE consult, fill out any forms or
questionnaires that you receive from your coach. Be sure to
take your time when filling out the forms and give yourself
sufficient time, in a distraction-free zone where you can focus
on yourself. Just prior to your coaching session, create an
agenda about what you hope to discuss and how your coach can
help, and then get ready to call your coach!
Jacqui Spiller, M.S.
Life Coach
214-924-1855
P.O. Box 700141
Dallas, Texas 75370
coach@moreauthenticlife.com
www.moreauthenticlife.com
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